My friends, I apologize for the length of this article, but every word was written from the deepest and most sincere part of my heart.
Inspired by the dozens of emails and messages I’ve received since the Don’t Let a Crisis Go To Waste webinar I did last week I will be doing Part 2 at 3:00pm EST on Friday!
But first, I have a few things to get off my chest. I hope you have a few minutes to read through this… (I’m sorry it’s a longggggg ass post.)
We have no choice but to dig deep and find our resolve in times like these. Our grandparents and their parents lived through world wars. We will get through this. That’s a fact.
As economist Paul Romer once stated, “a crisis is a terrible thing to waste.” We must consciously decide that no matter what happens, we’ll survive. Furthermore, we’ll come out the other side not having wasted a crisis. In Chinese, the word for “crisis” can be translated in two ways: “danger” or “opportunity.”
This is a world-view that’s served me well through countless trials and tribulations over the years. Let me explain…
First, let’s look to nature.
When a fire sweeps through a forest, many trees die. But not all of them. Deadwood and brush burn, mineralizing the soil, making room for new growth. This is nature’s way. It might seem brutal and harsh, but life goes on as long as you’re growing.
Similarly, economic cycles can be seen in this regenerative growth way as well. Depressions are a whole different beast, but a recession is actually a normal occurrence.
Please watch this short video:
Never stop growing. NEVER. STOP. GROWING. That’s the secret to survival…
I’ve Had To Start From Scratch Multiple Times. I’ve Lived Many Lives.
Let me frame this properly.
I grew up on a secluded religious commune 90 min from Toronto. We were very much self-sufficient and isolated from the outside world.
My grandfather started it and my father was farm-boss. Instead of going to high school, I was plowing the fields and driving heavy machinery by the age of 15.
It was around the age of 23 when I started to question the elders and indoctrination. All of a sudden, I found myself on the outside, looking in. Emotionally, spiritually, financially–suddenly I was on my own. No bank account, no credit score, no resume, no nothing.
I left the commune in 2001. I was consciously choosing to walk away from my friends, family, and all things familiar. It was by far the most terrifying decision of my life to this point.
I got the first job I could and ended up touring with Snoop Dogg. (Take a second and let that sink in and have a laugh.) Talk about a culture shock. From driving a farm tractor and listening to choir music to touring with Snoop Dogg and practically getting high on secondhand smoke backstage. I got to see most of North America. The good, the bad, and the ugly.
Less than a year later, I met a wonderful person who I will always be incredibly grateful and indebted to. She Loved me for who I was. She helped me integrate into society… I begin to thrive. We got married and in 2005 we had a son. His name is Milo. And he’s a primary reason I am here today, trying to make a difference in the world.
In order to make my relationship work, I had quit touring and started working as a landscaper/groundskeeper for a gentleman by the name of Gary Gilbert. Eventually he’d become one of the most influential mentors in my life.
He gave me a chance. He saw me for more than an illegal immigrant cutting grass and fixing his tractors for $15 an hour, cash. He trusted me. He thought I could be a top muffler salesman at one of his Midas shops (he had seven), in Topeka, Kansas. And he was correct…
I seized the opportunity and didn’t let him down. Within months he showed me how to work from the shop floor to the front desk, earning the trust and rapport of the mechanics sweating their asses off in the midsummer Kansas heat. And within a few short months, we turned around the fortunes of our little shop on Topeka Boulevard. Sales were up 23% in the first year and Gary didn’t have to close his original shop that he’d opened over 40 years before. It was an incredible experience.
But, after a few years, I got bored. I felt restless and wasn’t fulfilled. I felt compelled to do something of my own. Suddenly, instead of being this exemplary employee, I felt like a fraud. To make matters worse, Gary sat me down and said these exact words to me: “Jay, you need to decide how many of these shops you want to own one day. I don’t have anyone to take over the business…”
My mom had also just been diagnosed with breast cancer. And all of a sudden I was faced with a decision almost as scary as the one that led to me leaving the ‘farm.’ The decision that broke my parents’ hearts. Do I stay or do I go?
While I was a roadie, in fact before I even left the commune, I had decided to teach myself how to trade commodities. Not stocks or bonds, highly leveraged commodities on margin. $1 controlled $10-$50. I was convinced that this would ultimately be my destiny. I paid a few thousand bucks for some software and enrolled in some courses and started to trade.
But I failed miserably and lost all my money. I was heartbroken. It wasn’t a lot of money, less than $10k, but it was all I had saved to this point. It was my entire severance from the Farm plus, plus, plus…
Next, I decided to try MLM and network marketing. I failed spectacularly at these as well. I felt like a shady conman hitting up friends and family. (Ugh.)
But then by February 2004, I heard about this thing called “affiliate marketing.” I paid $50 for an e-book called GOOGLE CASH. Overture, the precursor to Yahoo! was the main player at the time. (Google AdWords was still in its infancy. But I was hooked like a worm. This was it!)
I generated my first few leads online with my homemade website featuring a fake Porsche banner ad and the rest is history. I quit Midas June 21, 2004 with about $2000 in my bank account. This was my ticket.
Six weeks later I was fucked. Out for drinks on Saturday night I realized I was completely broke and out of money. I had a panic attack. I pretended to be sick and ran home. Terrified and scared out of my gourd.
Fast forward a few months, I eventually figured it out. I had to. I had a newborn son and a skeptical wife.
Fast forward again. This time is single dad. (Any wonder?)
Fast forward yet again and looking for a change of scenery. Milo’s mom and I decide living in NYC is what we want next. Lifelong dream of both of us. So, we up-and-moved there in 2007. Thank GOD my affiliate business is able to sustain us all and the $4500 a month rent for our brownstone in Fort Greene, Brooklyn.
We absolutely loved it and my business continued to explode as the mortgage crisis began to derail the economy.
It’s now 2008. The banks began to collapse like a house of cards.
Yet CarbonCopyPRO, continued to grow like gangbusters. I signed a lease for my first office space across the river at 2nd and 2nd near Two Boots Pizza. We were crushing it.
At the time I thought it was all attributed to my genius. I had invested heavily in marketing and branding. Literally tens of thousands of dollars. It was finally paying off.
Maybe it was that, maybe it was just timing. (I like to think it was me genius but who the heck knows…)
Regardless, it’s now 2009. Simultaneously, my friend Zach introduced me to his friend Jen, who hit me up for finishing funds to complete a film, a documentary.
Next thing I know I’d agreed to become Executive Producer of documentary featuring every misfit in NYC—CHELSEA ON THE ROCKS. From Dennis Hopper and Ethan Hawks, to Milos Forman and ‘Sid & Nancy’. All I know is I find myself on the red carpet at the most prestigious film festival in the world, Cannes, looking for the after party.
But I learned a lot and I grew. I found myself working with the likes of Spike Lee and others who mentored me.
The best part was this, my daughter was born Dec 17, 2009, and my dream house was almost ready to move into. Life could not have been better.
2010 and ’11 brought more business partnerships with the likes of David Bach (the Automatic Millionaire best-selling author) and Simon Sinek (Start With Why). Between the two of them, our little business paid out close to $1.5m USD in royalties in 2011 alone.
But then, the reality of the great recession began to set in. No one was buying films and the real estate market was in the toilet. Yet again, I was going through another divorce, and all of a sudden I was on the ropes financially. I was confused, resentful, and completely burnt out.
My life has been a bizarre series of events until this point. I made my first million, and then lost it. I’d been rich, then broke-Ass poor.
I’ve been through bankruptcy and had my dream house foreclosed. Even the tax collectors wrote me off as dead. I’ve been sued, scammed, and screwed-over countless times, but I’ve always found a way to keep going.
Through all of this I’ve managed to keep growing, which brings me to where we are today…
We’re homebound and in this new situation, together.
I’m not sure if I’ll be able to get eggs at the store tomorrow.
I don’t know when I’ll see my kids again—the freaking border has been closed!
The liquor store doesn’t accept cash! My housekeeper is quarantined!!
But when thoughts like this make me anxious, I try my hardest (with a little help from my friends) to pull myself back to the moment, to say YES TO NOW.
Because here’s the thing: when this is all over, it won’t be business as usual. It will be business as whatever-the-fuck-you-make-it!
When something out of your control crashes, what you thought was REALITY gets shattered: This is happening to nearly everyone right now, SIMULTANEOUSLY. All of us are having to get used to a new reality. It’s insane.
But we don’t have to go insane along with it. In fact, I’m quite confident there’s an antidote to this madness. This is just my opinion here, my perspective. Try it on and see if it works for you. And if it resonates, feel free to share this with anyone that could benefit as well.
One thing we haven’t lost is the ability to insert positivity where there was, or is, insecurity. And this is the first big point.
How we choose to react to uncertainty and insecurity is largely involuntary and automatic. But if we’re present and mindful of our thoughts and actions, we can consciously modify them. Instead of being programmed to react with fear and anxiety, it’s actually possible to be in control of our emotions.
Some may call it self-regulation, others mindfulness. Whatever you call it, it’s about being aware and proactive vs. reactive. It’s about feeling sensible fear without letting it take hold. My mom used to say, “You can’t prevent a bird from landing on your head but you sure can prevent it from building a nest there.”
Be careful what thoughts you allow to permeate your mental space. Be careful what you allow yourself to ruminate on. Because the longer you stay there in your head, the deeper you will get sucked into the vicious circle of self-pity and victimology. Trust me on this. I’m better at getting lost down nightmarish rabbit holes than anyone.
“Do not give way to useless alarm; though it is right to be prepared for the worst, there is no occasion to look on it as certain.” ― Jane Austen
Next, we must accept that change is the only constant. We have to let go of our attachment to the status quo. Change is a bugger to deal with, even on a good day, because our brains are programmed to resist it. Because it’s usually uncomfortable, we inherently resist it at a cellular level. That’s normal. ESPECIALLY the sort of change we are experiencing right this moment, collectively.
Just a week or two ago, life was pretty normal. It’s impossible to comprehend how the other person is coping with the new reality they’re faced with. Today, we’re all sitting on the couch, in our PJ’s, at 3 in the afternoon, worried about our TP supply.
But, if we think about the first point I made above, and remind ourselves in every moment of fear that fear is not only normal, but inevitable, it’s HUMAN: 1, FEAR: 0.
And by the time you move from the couch to the bedroom tonight, it will hopefully be HUMAN: 259, FEAR: 13 or some awesome winning score like that. (I think of it like a game.)
To be able to channel change into personal growth is not only possible, we really have no choice but to get good at this.
I have no control over most of the things stressing me out. Yet, only I can control how I react. I can give into my fear or be mentally tough as nails and fight every negative thought with all my might.
Maslow’s hierarchy of needs begin with safety and security. In modern times, where we are now, this means financial security as much as anything.
Many of you are here for the same reason I started my company: so you didn’t have to rely on corporations, industries, and economies that are far out of your control in order to support yourself and your family. (I will never do that again.) And you honestly don’t have to either. This is actually up to you.
In fact, I would argue that you already have everything you require to become financially independent and self-reliant. Bold statement, but I’m serious. And this is exactly the case that I will be making Friday at 3:00pm EST.
Don’t think I’m coming from a place of having figured it all out. That’s certainly not the case. I’m still nervous about the state of the world and having a healthy dose of anxiety with my morning coffee, too. But I’ve made a habit of forcing myself to move on to proactive things that I can control. I don’t allow myself to dwell on negativity for more than a few moments.
Even after the dust settles on this pandemic, even on my deathbed, I don’t expect to have arrived. Life’s not about arriving safely anywhere. It’s about embracing the journey and trying to enjoy and make the best of the ride.
But I do have some real-world experience. I want to share it with you.
Some of you were on the call last week that I did with Justin where we shared perspectives from the last financial crash in 2008/2009. I want to continue this conversation with you because there’s still much to share. And quite frankly, you’ve inundated us with feedback and requests for more. Thus, we’re doing it again on Friday.
We’d Be Foolish Not To Let History Be Our Teacher.
In the last financial crash, enormous ships sank, taking thousands upon thousands of employees, people, and families with them. So many workers had to reinvent themselves and find solid footing once again. Not everyone recovered then and not everyone will recover from this either.
This is sobering. But as they say, necessity is the mother of invention.
With each of the last 4-5 recessions, businesses accelerated toward the digital space. Companies that reinvented quick enough survived. Many that were already on unsure ground were immediately wiped off the map.
I feel an urgency to talk to you because a serious recession is inevitable, it’s already at our heels. I want to tell everyone not to incite fear but because information is comforting. It’s hope. It’s the ability to prepare. I’m here with you.
Stay home. Don’t leave. Join me on Friday to talk more about strategy towards hope.
How can you insulate yourself now so that you won’t have an even harder time by the year’s end? Let’s avoid that guilt and shame you’d feel about what wasn’t done. WAKEUP to today, prepare yourself for a worst-case scenario, and hope for the best.
“Bloom where you are planted,” said Stella Payton. Even if where you’re planted is stuck in your house due to a pandemic for the foreseeable future: juggling childcare and a job and a household, or perhaps in total isolation and struggling to emotionally cope, or maybe suddenly unemployed or underemployed and still needing to pay rent.
“Seen from space,” said Scott Kelly, a retired astronaut that once spent nearly a year on the International Space Station, “the Earth has no borders. The spread of the coronavirus is showing us that what we share is much more powerful than what keeps us apart, for better or for worse. All people are inescapably interconnected, and the more we can come together to solve our problems, the better off we will all be.” This is the perspective of space.
I’ve never been to space, I couldn’t possibly say what that perspective would be like, but many of us have had some perspective with this space we’ve had to take, away from our physical communities in quarantine. But given what I’ve been through–from commune to Kansas through valleys and great heights and into valleys all over again–I think I have a perspective that could help you.
Can’t wait to share more at 3:00 EST this Friday! See you there:)
All my best,
Comment, Share, And Inspire On My Friends!
P.S. For details on how to join the webinar stream, head to this page.
26 thoughts on “THE PERSPECTIVE OF SPACE”
Oh my God Jay, you are 100% and completely right about all the aspects you have brought forward here in this article.
Thank you so much for sharing this, you have confirmed everything that I was personally thinking myself. Reading your article solidified to me that I am not the only one thinking about this.
I can’t wait to join you on your call for more of your insights.
Thanks Jay. I understand what you’re expressing. Starting over and over, it’s exhausting. Add being burnt beyond recognition by others well, shit. Sometimes it’s nice to be way out on the farmland. I’ve always said, wakeup people, including myself. Chin up, take care, from upstate New York.🌷🐦
Awesome perspective Jay, thank you for sharing your story. Your gift is ‘courage in the face of adversity’ can’t wait to listen to you on Friday
Thank you Thank you Thank you
I will be at the webinar .
I worked for cash and now have none – and even when i had work & cash i couldnt afford to become part of SFM for long & had to drop out . Paying a US price with New Zealand dollars didnt work for me . The ‘meetings’ with people leaning back very very comfortably were painfully long and i needed to make money & live . Following Gary V. & Brok Johnson now and trying for the first time affiliate marketing but the brands of my most loved superfoods only want someone who has popular social media connections already . Then there is Sophie Howard who sells on Amazon & lives in Wanaka ( Millionaires playground she calls it ) but she things you have to have at least $2000 to invest . I have $20 New Zealand in my account and the guy i helped create an AirBnb for ( styling – interior ) who i gave mates rates to the whole time ….oh whatever . Maybe people just show their true colours now . Better now than never . Transparency feels so much better anyway 🙂
Aroha nui from Aotearoa
Based on the many books I read, your journey reminded me to one, particularly, ‘The Alchemist’ by Paolo Coelho. That book gave me hope in the hardest times in my life. Through that way of thinking I placed my comfort zone to constant changes so much that i became addicted and every few month I need to change something in my life. I learnt to be someone who is like a grasshopper, adapts to her environment constantly. The current situation will require a huge adaptation from us all and I am very grateful to you and the whole SFM community that you make this journey easier to us all by your supporting and inspirational thoughts! Thank you, Jay. I look forward to see you on the webinar!
Thank you for share Jay.
I can relate to your story pretty much.
As I say to my family and friends, I have already life 3 lives inside this lifetime.
In my 57 years, I start from scratch several times, with only the clothes on my body, literally.
My severe accident last April put me on this new route, and I am enjoying a lot living this new game, and learn daily with you and Stuart.
This is my motto “This is a tough universe, only the Tigers survive, and even them sometimes have a tough time”. L Ron Hubbard
Let’s became more tough and solid on our future targets and purpose as Tigers we are.
Hi Jay, Thanks for sharing and for the motivation you provide everytime you write or speak; I lived in Norwich, Ontario Canada, from 2006 to 2010 so I understand the guts and extraordinary effort you’ve made to be where you are today. I believe in you b/cos you’ve done it so many times over and this experience plus insight to the future is priceless to all of us who are lucky to be recieving this information.The best way to thank you is to use and apply what I am learning from you to make my life better and to use it to help as many People as possible. Thank you,thank you. -Toni Lalluk; The Netherlands.
I’ve read this in the morning.. Now I needed to come back here because your thoughts have just inspired me to move my idea forward and have an insane brainstorm! I ended up writing my first ever content plan and ad draft, very raw.. It’s an amazing feeling as I think it’s above my own ‘selfish’ goals and in alignment with my purpose goal – if there is such a thing… fitting into today’s currents.. it’s kind of a side stem growing parallel with the main one..
I am lacking a lot of practical knowledge in between the idea and the outcome, but, top down projects might be the ones that come out bold at the end..
Thank you for this!
(note: I was able to share some of your thoughts with my other half, reading his book beside me. Awesome feeling as I could also make him watch the first part of the coming webinar. Let’s see if he’s ready for the second part.. I know he listens..)
I want to thank you so much for taking time to encourage us with this amazing post. You described my life almost to the T. I am looking forward to be part of the second part.
I love you and I thank you!
“Son,brother, father, grandfather, army veteran, new digital affiliate marketer/entrepreneur, amateur musician”
Thanks for sharing Jay. Powerful!
That was interesting. I love to read your story. It sounds like you grew up very much like my family. When you can travel again, I would like to invite you to come to visit us in Belize, Central America.
See you tomorrow. Elma
Dude can’t wait I was so hyped reading this
Loved the long Jay. Look forward to tomorrow at 3.
Hey Jay, how are you?hope your doing well, don’t know why I started this conversation so informal and I hardly know you. Based on what you shared through your blog about your personal occurrence and from your webinars I’ve watched that’s pretty much it. I’m a member of SFM (mentors). however, that’s not the case, I read your blog all of it and sh*t you have a story as do we all but, I want to say thank for your post you continue to share your light of thoughts and what you and Stuart does is incredible putting this academic community together for people to realise that they do and unlock so much more of their true potentials developing new skills towards better future where we don’t have to depend entirely on the economy for an income… so hats off! will be joining Friday, tomorrow for part 2 of the new wake call about the crisis we’re facing and how we can come out on the better hand of this if we put our best foot forward. well mostly I’ll watch it have no disrespect or whatever even thou I believe there’s non taking but my workplace is still open since it consider to be an essential business and I choose to go in order to make bread. Ya being talk/typing too much now so thank you for sharing your post and see you then.
Wow! totally different perspectives to look through a different lens to learn.
Totally inspiring! Thank you Jay 🙏
This totally reinforced my positive mindset. I am a “full-time” mother of two amazing boys (6 and 10) and …I’ve been through a lot of s*** myself (bankruptcy, divorce, homelessness …to mention just a few). I’ve hit bottom rock too, had doors slammed in my face, yet NEVER gave up , never stopped believing that “there’s always a way”. I cannot help it not to worry sometimes as well (it is only normal) BUT “this shall pass too”. And we WILL come out at the other end stronger, kinder, wiser and more appreciative! Every single time I went through hardship, things have ALWAYS (eventually) turned better! I refuse to believe any other than that!
You are such a Blessing.
WOW! You are so cool, Jay. I would love to hear you play cello. I play a fender Stratecaster. Thank you for sharing how you grew up. You’re a man of great inspiration and sincereness. I have some worries about this coronavirus too. I’m worried about animals, my family and friends, who I don’t see anymore. I’ve not played pickleball in such a long time since the YMCA in Hartwell, Ga closed. It’s closed till farther notice. I hope that I get a place to live in soon. Living in an SUV ain’t easy. I’m a survivor and so is everyone else, students, members and leaders and mentors. I love all y’all.
Incredibly inspiring Jay. This blog post has left me positively speechless. Thank you for the time and effort you’ve put into this!
So glad that you got value from it, Jennifer!
I read the above with interest. It is certainly a wake-up call. I have been trying to escape the so called rat race for decades and as a result, I am worse off now financially than I would have been had I just been content with my lot. I could look back with regret at all the money I have lost but regret gets you nowhere. My wife and I had plans for our retirement and that was to retire to Spain which we did, and we are grateful for that but it wasn’t to be in the manner we had planned. The main reason was the Financial Crash of 2007/8. It just about wiped us out and we were lucky not to have gone bankrupt. Some people I know are just waiting for the inevitable bankruptcy and the current situation is going to make it even worse for them. In a way, we are lucky we avoided that path. Even though we managed to retire to Spain the knocks hadn’t finished with us. Just before we moved to Spain my wife was diagnosed with Dementia. This gave us a dilemma, do we move to Spain or stay in the UK. We decided to move. Life is good here but it has its moments. I try to make my wife’s life as good as I can and we are making the best of it. Then this virus hits the world. People are dying left, right and centre. Again we must be grateful that at the moment we are safe. We have been in lockdown for nearly two weeks now. This, however, is now starting to affect my wife. She can’t quite understand what is happening. She asks me the same questions over and over again every day and it gets very frustrating. Many times I bite my tongue but sometimes I don’t, then she gets upset and I feel guilty because I should know better, I know she can’t help it. She is an intelligent woman had a great career where she has affected many people’s lives for the better. Now all she does is sit and do jigsaws all day long and stares at the tv in the evening. It is very sad to see. But on the good side, I still have her, she is still here with me. A lot of people aren’t so lucky in these uncertain times. I have digressed somewhat, I was going to say how I have been feeling this week being locked down and trying to build this online business. When we moved to Spain we both decided no more ventures, we had had enough. But it wasn’t to be I was introduced to SFM coming on 12 months ago and at first, I said no, I am not interested. Cut a long story short SFM has been the best thing for me, it gave me hope, it relit the fire within and it has been an incredible journey so far. It has had it’s ups and downs obviously. This last week, however, has been the biggest down so far, in as much as I am starting to question myself can I actually do this. I don’t want to accept yet another failure and I certainly don’t want to lose the dream of finally achieving the results I want and I don’t want to be that gold miner who was just Three Feet From Gold. I also don’t want to lose the connection I have made with this amazing community. I had a good chat with one member of this community yesterday, (we all know him) about my situation and as a result, I will be renewing my membership next month. I am not giving up. All we need is hope, hope keeps us going in the darkest of moments. We all have our situations to deal with, life is not plain sailing. If it was, what a boring place it would be.
Jay thank you so much for sharing your life Journey.
WoW! That is inspiring. You are such a Blessing person.
I thank God for guiding me toward your path. Your message is awake
call for me.
I’m very grateful to join your community.
Universal truths! Keep bringing the light, there are so many people on this planet that need it in the darkness! What you’re doing is truly amazing – making people happy and teach them how to make other happy and the whole thing bring you money and everybody is happy, everybody gets money. If this spreads to the whole world, we will all be happy, leave in peace, there will be no hunger, no poverty. These crazy times have been brought upon us to unite us. The level of ‘digitalism’ has reached the point at which it is finally possible for all of us to unite, care for one another, share love. Your idea is the future. Absolutely spot on!
Thank you, thank you, thank you Jay.
Totally inspired me to continue to work hard on my modules to move forward towards my dreams and the future to serve others.Feeling very blessed and grateful to find my new SFM family. Much appreciated of all of the wisdom and insight from the community.
. Dear Jay,
I just read your post and I am blown !!!!
I started the program 2 weeks ago and honestly I wouldn’t have imagine to meet this level of conciousness and inspiration which mirror my conception of life.
I greet you all from Paris and look forward making progress in this fascinating journey.